Mirror Mirror

My mother had me when she was twenty-four years old, two weeks after her birthday, to be exact. These days, as I approach my birthday, I find myself celebrating her even more. I’m unsure if it’s crossing the threshold of being twenty-four, becoming a mother myself, or simply living a bit more life that’s made me reflect on her more deeply. Whatever the reason, I’m grateful for it. Recently, while trying to decipher a text on my phone, I caught my reflection on the screen. At that moment, I noticed the furrowed brow, the quizzical squint, the pursing of my lips, expressions that I now realise aren’t just mine. They’re hers, passed down so naturally that I can no longer tell where her mannerisms end and mine begin.

On her birthday, I am struck by how much of her lives in me. It’s not just the shared DNA, but the habits, quirks, preferences, and values she has passed down over the years. I’ve become more aware of how deeply intertwined our lives are, and I see her in myself and my daughter and sister. We are, undeniably, our mother’s daughters.

One of the most telling signs of this connection is my need for a clean house. I can’t relax unless everything is in its place. It’s more than just a desire for cleanliness, it’s a need for peace. My mother is the same way. Growing up, I used to think it was excessive how she couldn’t leave the house without tidying up, even when she was already running late. But now, I’ve become just like her, though thankfully, I’m better at being on time! I can’t walk out the door if there are dishes in the sink or cushions out of place. This trait brings me peace, and I embrace it, knowing that my mother’s sense of order is something I carry with me.

Then, there’s the popcorn. It’s not just a snack in our family; it’s a ritual. The sound of kernels popping, the familiar aroma, it’s all comforting. My mother’s love for popcorn was evident; it was her go-to treat during quiet afternoons or late-night movie marathons. Just like her, I’ve adopted the same love for this simple snack. My sister and my daughter have too. It’s a small but significant tradition that connects us across generations, reminding us of the joy in life’s simple pleasures.

Speaking of food, my mother’s appreciation for a good meal is well-known in our family. She never rushed through eating. Instead, she savoured every bite, appreciating the time, effort, and love that went into preparing it. Watching her enjoy food taught me that eating is more than just a necessity; it’s an experience. I’ve inherited that same appreciation. Every meal is an opportunity to create memories, share love, and find comfort. My mother showed me that food has the power to bring people together, and it’s a lesson I carry with me every time I prepare a dish for my family or friends.

Beyond these everyday habits, it’s my mother’s deep value for peace that perhaps ties us most closely together. She has always been a woman who sought peace in her home and relationships. She never thrived in chaos or gossip but instead created environments where love could grow. As I’ve grown older, I’ve found myself craving the same sense of calm. Whether it’s in how I organise my home, engage with others, or raise my children, the desire for peace echoes my mother’s steady example. Her ability to navigate life with such grace, rarely letting external conflicts get her out of her lane, is something I’ve come to admire deeply.

It’s not just me who carries these traits. My sister, in her own way, is also a reflection of our mother. We laugh now at how often we find ourselves saying or doing something exactly as she would have. In our unique ways, we are growing into the women she shaped us to be, whether it’s in how we tackle challenges with quiet determination or how we care for our homes and families. It’s both humbling and heartwarming to realise that as we grow, we are not just growing up, we’re growing into our mother.

Now, I see the same beautiful continuation in my daughter. Though she is still young, there are already glimpses of my mother in her, the way she loves people, her fondness for tea and meat, and her nurturing nature. She may not fully understand it yet, but she is part of a legacy of strong, loving women who value peace, kindness, and family.

As I reflect on these connections, my mother, my sister, my daughter, and myself, I am filled with gratitude. We are mirrors of each other, each generation reflecting the lessons, love, and life of the one before it. Today, as I celebrate my mother’s birthday, I celebrate not just her, but the legacy she’s given us. The quiet ways she’s shaped who we are. It’s a privilege to reflect her strength, grace, and love. And as I catch my reflection in the mirror, I smile because I am me because of her.

For at one time, you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true), and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord. Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. ~ Ephesians 5:8-11 (ESV)

As children of God, we are called to reflect Him in all we do. Just as I’ve realised how deeply I mirror my mother’s traits, I’ve also come to see that my life must be a reflection of my Heavenly Father. He has set the stage for us, much like my mother set the foundation for my life, and it’s now up to me to mirror His ways in this world. Paul’s words in Ephesians 5 point to four distinct ways in which we are to mirror God: His light, His character, His grace, and His peace. In unpacking these aspects, we find that God’s reflection in us not only transforms our lives but also impacts the world around us.

Mirror His light.

To mirror God’s light means to live in a way that reveals His truth, goodness, and righteousness. Light, by its nature, exposes things. It brings clarity and understanding where there was once confusion and ignorance. In the same way, when we reflect God’s light, our lives should illuminate His truth to the world. Mirroring His light means we don’t just absorb the teachings of Christ, we radiate them. Our actions, words, and even our very presence should be a beacon of hope and understanding to those who are lost or struggling. Just as a mirror reflects light from one source to another, we are to reflect the light of Christ in every area of our lives. Whether it’s in how we love others, how we respond to difficult situations, or how we stand up for what is right, our lives should consistently point back to the source of that light: God Himself.

But reflecting God’s light also means we must confront the darkness in ourselves. The verse calls us to “have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.” To mirror God’s light requires ongoing introspection, identifying the areas of our lives that still harbour darkness, bringing them before God, and allowing His light to transform us. It’s in this continual process of illumination that we grow to become more like Him.

Mirror His character.

Mirroring the character of God means cultivating these attributes in our own lives. This is not about perfection but about growth, the slow but steady process of becoming more like Christ in thought, word, and deed. Goodness speaks to how we treat others. It’s easy to be kind to those who are kind to us, but true goodness reflects God’s heart, a heart that is good to all, even those who may not deserve it. Mirroring God’s goodness means showing compassion, forgiveness, and love, even when it’s difficult. It’s in these moments that we become a reflection of the Father’s goodness to the world.

Righteousness involves aligning our choices with His will, even when it costs us something. Righteousness requires a deep sense of integrity, doing what’s right, not for recognition, but because it reflects who God is. And reflecting God’s truth means to live authentically, to speak honestly, and to walk in integrity. It’s about aligning our lives with the ultimate truth found in Christ and not compromising that truth for worldly gain or approval.

Mirror His grace.

One of the most foundational ways to reflect God’s nature is by mirroring His grace. Grace is the undeserved favour God extends to us, and as His children, we are called to extend that grace to others. In a world that often operates based on merit, giving to those who have earned or deserve something, grace stands out in stark contrast. It offers love, forgiveness, and kindness, even when they haven’t been earned. Mirroring God’s grace means letting go of grudges, forgiving those who have wronged us, and loving those who may not be easy to love. It means showing patience when we’d rather react in frustration, and offering second chances when the world says “once is enough.” This is perhaps one of the most difficult aspects of reflecting God because grace often goes against our fallen human nature. But when we extend grace, we demonstrate the heart of the Gospel, that God loves us, not because of what we do, but because of who He is.

God’s grace also teaches us to extend grace to ourselves. As we seek to mirror Him, we will fall short. We will make mistakes. But just as God extends grace to us, we are called to receive that grace and keep growing, allowing His grace to cover our shortcomings and strengthen us for the journey ahead.

Mirror His peace.

Be a carrier of God’s peace. In a world that is hellbent on running on chaos and confusion, hate and hurry, we ought to be carriers of our Father’s peace wherever we go. This peace is not merely the absence of conflict; it’s the presence of God’s calm assurance during life’s storms. To reflect God’s peace means that we become agents of peace in our relationships, our communities, and within ourselves. It means we seek reconciliation where there is division, speak words that soothe rather than stir up strife, and cultivate a heart of patience and understanding. Mirroring God’s peace involves choosing to trust in His sovereignty, even when circumstances are overwhelming. It’s about staying grounded not because of external circumstances of life, but because of the unchanging nature of God.

Peace also requires action. As peacemakers, we are called to actively pursue peace, not only in our personal lives but in the world around us. Whether that means standing up for justice, advocating for those who are oppressed, or simply bringing a calming presence to a tense situation, our reflection of God’s peace should lead us to be catalysts for change in a world that desperately needs it.

As I reflect on how I’ve grown to mirror my mother, I realise that my ultimate calling is to mirror my Heavenly Father. Just as my mother set the foundation for who I am, God has set the stage of life for me, and it’s my responsibility to reflect Him in all that I do. Whether it’s shining His light, living out His character, extending His grace, or cultivating His peace, my life is meant to be a mirror, a reflection of the One who made me. In the same way, I pray that others see God in you. We are all part of a legacy, one that points back to the Creator who loves us unconditionally. As we grow and mature in faith, may we continue to reflect His light, His character, His grace, and His peace, becoming mirrors of His love to a world that needs it.